What Defines Us

Whatever we use most in terms of character traits, thoughts and feelings, that would grow in us and come to define us.
Many years ago I was going through difficulty. Because I was hurting, I kept talking about it everywhere I was with my friends.
One day one of my friends looked at me and said, “Rodica, you are complaining all the time.”
That direct remark made me burst in tears, but helped me switch the way I talked and lived my life.
The kind of words we use today, will shoot roots and shape who we become tomorrow.
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When You Know “It’s Enough”

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There are seasons in life when you have to say, “This is enough!”

We build a relationship to last. We invest love and care and tears sometimes. Commitment is a serious thing. But when the abuse creeps in and when cheating goes on, there are not too many alternatives.

I learned that:

1.  TIMING IS IMPORTANT – Don’t make a drastic decision because of an emotional impulse. Give yourself time to think to God and pray about it.

2. TELL YOUR SPOUSE WHAT IS GOING TO BE – I was afraid of my husband because he abused me in every way for many years. But I was also telling him that if he wouldn’t stop hurting me, I would divorce him.

3. MOM, DON’T LEAVE YOUR CHILDREN BEHIND – I know you need miracles as money, housing and support in order to survive by yourself caring for your children. There are miracles ahead of you. Pray to God. I lived marveling of how we made it through another day.

4.  A MAN CAN’T FIX YOUR LIFE. GOD CAN. – I had girlfriends who dived into a new relationship pretty fast after their divorce. Most of them were hurt again. Let your life settle. Give yourself time to heal. Healing brings clear mind. Focus on the little joys with your children, family and friends.

5. JESUS IS REAL. HE IS NEAR. He kept me sane through the trial. He kept away the predators. He helped me and my children in every specific aspect. We prayed for food, He sent somebody with groceries. We prayed for the bills to be paid, He came up with resources. Other people sent us on vacations, in camps, and even abroad.

Life is precious. Live it well.

 

 

I Didn’t Believe In Ghosts

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One of my friends who was on the road to church saw two people who took their lives yesterday. It happened just before her eyes. When we prayed together, she was still shaking from such a terrible experience.

Sometimes life becomes unbearable. People who put their hope in their own abilities, gifts and talents, in a  job, a relationship, their health, get discouraged. Anxiety and depression kick in. I’ve been there.

Disappointment can be powerful. Pain may be so heavy that the brain cannot handle it anymore. We try to help each other, but even the strongest human being gets tired, gets old and has to leave the earth one day.

What to do?

I was an atheist. I thought science had the ultimate answers to my questions about life. But it didn’t. When you are alone with your own thoughts, you see there is no earthly help that is there for you forever.

I started to read about some solutions other people said they found in life philosophies. I looked for what was important in life, things like peace, happiness, knowledge… Unfortunately, they were limited to good intentions only. I wanted something to surpass “here and now.” Then I looked into personalities and “gods” of different religions to give me the sense of life. I was disappointed again when I realized that each of them was dead.

I looked into the Christian religion and I didn’t like it. I was sick and tired of rules and commandments. Then somebody presented me Jesus.

“Religion can’t give you the sense of life, but Jesus can.” That sounded weird. I didn’t believe in ghosts.

“Aren’t religion and Jesus the same thing?” I asked.

“Religion is a set of rules that claim to take you to heaven. Jesus is not a set of rules. He is a person. He is the truth and the way to live forever.”

I looked into what I was told. I said, “Jesus, if you are out there, give me a sign.” I needed something that only a supernatural intervention could do. And He did it.

He invited me in a relationship with Him. Yes, He has a mouth and speaks directly to the heart. He gave me courage in life. He was with me through the deepest valleys. When I was on the verge of taking my own life, He gave me hope. When depression got me, He freed me.

That’s why I wrote this. I’m a witness.